full-circle or something like it.

so i guess that, since i started with a road trip, it'd be fitting to end with one, too. which is exactly what i did. last week.
a quick one, yes, but certainly high-end quality. it was incredible seeing friends i hadn't seen in a long time (some in over two years!) and, although it felt a bit odd to be sleeping on the sofa in my own apartment, being back in dc felt a bit like being home again. as close to "my city" as ever, i suppose.

some funny tidbits about being back in the us...
-upon arrival, i became one of those traveller loonies so excited to be re-immersed in her native language that i initiated plenty of absurd and unnecessary conversations with total strangers, just because i could really speak again!
-for the first week or so, i kept reaching for the toilet-side trash bin for my t.p. !!
-not knowing what the heck is in most of my food (not funny, really - a fact of life here and something i, clearly, don't enjoy!)
-PRICES!! i, painfully, have become even cheaper than i was upon leaving for turkey. low lira prices spoiled me, i guess... fall-time city-living might just give me a stroke.
-apparently, when reunited with fellow alanya amazons, ALL i can talk about is turkey. pathetic, really. (sorry friends i excluded..)

home now..

Restless

I can hear in your voice
you were born in one country
and will die in another,

and where you live is where you'll be buried,
and when you dream it's where you were born,

and the moon never hangs in both skies
on the same night,

and that's why you think the moon has a sister,
that's why your day is hostage to your nights,

and that's why you can't sleep except by forgetting,
you can't love except by remembering.

And that's why you're divided: yes and no.
I want to die. I want to live.
Never go away. Leave me alone.

I can hear by what you say
your first words must have been mother and father.

Even before your own name, mother.
Long before amen, father.

And you put one word in your left shoe,
one in your right, and you go walking.

And when you lie down you tuck them
under your pillow, where they give rise
to other words: childhood, fate, and rescue.
Heaven, wine, return.

And even god and death are offspring.
Even world is begotten, even summer
a descendant. And the apple tree. Look and see

the entire lineage alive
in every leaf and branching
decision, snug inside each fast bud,

together in the flower, and again
in the pulp, mingling in the fragrance
of the first mouthful and the last.

I can tell by your silence you've seen the petals
immense in their vanishing.

Flying, they build your only dwelling.
Falling, they sow shadows at your feet.

And when you close your eyes
you can hear the ancient fountains
from which they derive,

rock and water ceaselessly declaring
the laws of coming and going.

(by li-young lee)

roadtrip = last horrah!

the past week has been a true trip. in classic hazel style, i realized only belatedly that next week i leave the country. for 8 months. so, clearly, decided to squeeze in a lot. and succeeded, amazingly, with the help of some of the many fabulous people in my life... for example: hoppin' boston-area swing dance (photos unavailable, as taken with old-school camera [that gets guaranteed free film from walgreens for life ...of camera] - but trust me, we swung like true swingers).. road trip to glorious harrisburg.. excursion to dc + georgetown [instert thai food + friends].. a fab night in manhattan + wandering around dumbo, ogling art.. brunching in boston.. 'tis not easy for me to say g'bye (my brain doesn't catch on until later), so i'll just share these fantastic photos (taken in dc by lily p the lovely!):

purdy sunset over the lincoln memorial.

reflections off the basin (jefferson in background)

ride it, lil..

anne + crepes + bubble tea?

on the potomac. aren't we cute?

cheap wine in mia's fancy apt!

clearly, the us can be fun, too.

october days on the water...

True, I am still in New Hampshire. True, there are many things I despise about this state - the homogeneity of its populous, the prevalence of Mommy SUVs, overglorified shopping malls, overgrown mosquitos. However, New Hampshire can also be extremely, incredibly beautiful. For example, a crisp, October kayak excursion.

Today, I took out a group of 6 chiropractors for an afternoon tour around the New Castle area. For those of you who know the area, Portsmouth is a charmingly beautiful region, and the water we kayak in is pristinely gorgeous. New Castle itself is the smallest town in NH - only .8 square miles - and home to the richest population per square mile in the state. Thus, prime real estate. Not only that, but, more impressively in my eyes, the water's aura makes you forget the huge houses, and houses in general. The best paddling is around nearby uninhabited islands and grasses, in constant sight of great blue herons, cormorants, seagulls, snowy egrets, and the occasional seal. And this time of year, who can miss the fleeting monarch butterflies crossing over the water? There is nothing more wonderful than a paddle here on a sunny day.

The season has been winding down. It gets colder here in October, school's in full swing, people become busy, the weather grows more unpredictable. So any tours I get to lead are precious breaks from taking calls in the shop, jealously cursing the sunshine from the other side of the window. Today, I had the special pleasure of not only touring the chiropractors, but also a couple in the evening. This allowed me the unique and distinct experiences of a Fall afternoon and Fall evening paddle. How different and fabulous they are!

Fall Afternoon: crisp air, cool wind, bright, sunny, warm enough for light layers, tide receeding, sunglasses a must!! We were the only ones on the water! The leaves had begun turning.

the leaves change...

Fall Evening: much cooler after the sun faded, quiet, calm water, sun beginning to go down, HUGE full moon!! All was calm, relaxed, alive, but subdued. Very peaceful, beautiful, extreme color contrasts. Glorious sunset. The moon's glory couldn't even be captured by the camera.


what colors...
Just meditating in the beauty of the here + now instead of anxiously awaiting the adventure to come...

to blog or...?

it's one month to take-off. it seems like a lot, but already my mind has begun spinning. i'm at that antsy pre-travel stage of dreaming about the plane. so i've been thinking about keeping in touch with everyone i love..

i'll be honest. i've always disliked the "blogging" concept... and made-up words that function as both noun and verb. BUT, after much consideration i have realized that my dislike of mass, impersonal travel emails outweighs my hatred of blogs by just enough to get this lil' page on its feet.

i also respect the weight of shared experience, and believe in its power to change minds and feelings. why do we write? why do we have language? to communicate meaning. so i will try, ever so plainly, to share some of my thoughts, some of my experiences, some of my feelings, as i undertake this journey...

here's the plan...
a) leave of absence from college.
b) crazy trip across the world.
my starting point: london. my destination: istanbul. along the way: amsterdam, madrid, andalucia, rabat, cairo, damascus... and wherever wanderlust and an almost empty pocket leads me.


so be prepared for a potpourri of hazel-musings
and randomness...
do enjoy... or not.. but remember that i love hearing from you...

and, mis amigos, wherever you are, if you happen to be looking for a travel buddy, i'm your girl.






(look - i'm so excited)